Studies show that a high percentage of Americans consider themselves overweight, and an even higher percentage believe they are being chased by Frankenstein's monster. Alter self-perceptions with today's Groupon: at VeinSolutions' in Stoneham. Choose from the following options:

• For $149, you get one sclerotherapy treatment for spider veins (a $450 value).
• For $125, you get an IPL photofacial (a $300 value).
• For $60, you get a facial chemical peel (a $150 value).

The staff of board-certified vascular avengers at VeinSolutions tailor their cosmetic procedures to each patient's individual needs, refurbishing frowning frontispieces and minimizing the appearance of unsightly spider veins. Sclerotherapy treatments take place in a private, comfortable office; doctors employ a very fine needle to inject 18 cc's of an FDA-approved solution into the voracious vein and start the divorce proceedings. Following the injection, legs don a pair of compression hose for several days, which help fuse the damaged vein walls and reassure nervous gams with a round-the-clock bear hug. Over time, the appearance of affronting arachno-capillaries diminishes as the body reabsorbs them. With little to no down time, clients can typically resume their normal day-to-day activities right away, although heavy exercise and prolonged sitting, standing, or crawling to avoid unfriendly fire is discouraged for the first three days post-treatment.

Alternatively, marred mugs can get an expert makeover with the photofacial, which uses advanced IPL technology to penetrate skull masks with healing light and combat epidermaflaws, such as small veins or the redness associated with rosacea. Customers can also opt for a chemical peel to unpack gunky pores and exorcise the spirits of dead skin cells. Thought to increase natural elastin and collagen production, this treatment can help reduce the appearance of fine lines, wrinkles, and fight the effects of aging more effectively than thumb wrestling Father Time.