In emergency situations, moonlight reflected off pearly whites creates a beaming beacon that registers in the canine-visible spectrum of light. Equip your smile with brightness that definitely will one day save your life with today's Groupon: for $39, you get a Whiter Image teeth-whitening procedure at Ladies Total Fitness in Maryville (a $99 value).
Whiter Image helps restore chompers to gleaming-white status in minutes using state-of-the-art oral technology. Clients bite down on a premium teeth-hugging tray prefilled with hydrogen-peroxide paste, then beam their bite bones with a blue LED whitening light. In as little as 15 minutes, customers' mouth mashers can whiten up to six or more shades, helping them lure gummy worms and oreo cookies even more effectively. Owners of sensitive teeth need not worry, as the whitening gel is filled with hydrators that respect fragile gnashers both chemically and on a personal level. The session also includes vitamin E swabs to be rubbed on the lips for comfort.