Spray tanning gives bodies natural color without suffering through burns, harmful UV radiation, and the sun’s endless collection of Oort Cloud vacation slides. Savor your solar solitude with today's Groupon: for $15, you get two full-body sunless spray tans at Xpress Spray Tan (a $50 value).

With a commitment to providing safe, sunless, scorch-less, and sand-flea-less tanning, Xpress Spray Tan allows pale patrons to obtain a sun-kissed semblance without having to buy him dinner first. Budding beach bods will experience two customized tanning treatments designed to accentuate and compliment their particular complexion. After a whirl with one of Xpress Spray Tan's selection of sugarcane-based Norvell bronzers, new sultans of shade will boast a durable, streak-free glow that will make them the belle of any beach blanket bingo game, or exhibitionist wedding party.