Inaccessible to the hands, back musculature often falls prey to freeloading Kick Me signs and hitchhiking parrots. Liberate a beleaguered back with today's Groupon: for $30, you get a one-hour Swedish massage at Absolute Therapeutic Spa LLC in Oshkosh (a $60 value).

Absolute Therapeutic Spa LLC’s experienced massage therapists coat bodies in soothing strokes during a range of muscle-mending therapeutic services. Swedish massage harnesses the power of long, gentle strokes to help limber-up ligaments and maintain tendons' elasticity. The therapist's trained hands traverse musculature with pinpointed kneads and gliding rubs that aim to reduce tension as effectively as taking a catnap inside a stress ball. During the 60-minute relax-a-thon, clients can receive a revitalizing boost in circulatory and nervous-system functioning, rebooting patrons’ bodies and minds to their original stress-free factory settings.