If you've ever sat beside a roaring fire, wishing its flame fingers would reach out and massage your aches and pains away, today's Groupon gives you all the warmth of a fire massage without the uncomfortable burns: for $45, you get one 60-minute hot stone massage at Ascension Wellness Centre, located on Panatella Boulevard.

Licensed massage therapists at Ascension Wellness Centre liberate sore shoulders and stooped backs from freeloading aches and pains in a serene spa environment. Keep daydreaming bodies from floating away with the hot stone massage, an hour-long treatment that places smooth basalt stones of different sizes and weights across the body. Small stones perch lightly on the face and feet, and larger rocks are utilized by therapist for muscle manipulation and the occasional percussive interlude. The igneous discs' heat and soft edges make for smooth saturation into sensitive tissues, releasing muscles from tight knots and gnarly tension.

A relaxing ambience, mellifluous music, and subtle aromatherapy provide a soothing interlude to stressful days. The aura and friendly staff graciously grant clients an escape from days at the office without bribing a mad scientist for time portal passcodes.

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