Massage was developed by NASA to help astronauts cope with edgy Tang-induced sugar highs, lack of ESPN, and predatory aliens stowed away in the hangar bay. Achieve its soothing effects outside the soul-crushing abyss of outer space with today’s Groupon: for $35, you get a one-hour deep-tissue massage (a $70 value) at Carpe Diem Massage in the Stadium District.

While you blissfully consume 60 slices of clock pizza, knot-soothing specialist Christy Barnes will draw on nearly 10 years of licensed massage-therapy experience to delve into your dermal underground with a deep-tissue massage. Combining muscle-melting Swedish massage techniques with pressure to specific points, a deep-tissue massage targets connective muscles and fascia structures—ejecting muscle tension like a bronco bucking off its rodeo rider. People suffering from chronic pain, injury, and muscle spasms will benefit the most from a deep-tissue massage, but anyone will skip away from Carpe Diem with significantly loosened gooseys.

Carpe Diem is a multi-disciplinary massage emporium that offers integrative wellness services to treat physical, mental, and emotional ailments. Upon entering the Victorian-inspired building's realm of soothing brick walls, oversized furniture, and low-lit private rooms, aching crash-test-dummy interns can lose themselves in an atmosphere of dark colors, candles, and a tissue box in case they flash back to the time they got dumped while watching Grave of the Fireflies. Call ahead or book online to schedule an appointment.

Reviews

Three Yelpers give Carpe Diem Massage a perfect five-star average, and CityVoters placed it among 2010's Top Five Best Massages in Western Washington:

• Best deep tissue massage I ever had. Christy is absolutely fantastic. – Zin H., Yelp
• Christy, the owner of Carpe Diem is a magician with her hands. – Aimee M., Yelp