The Aztecs used a currency system in which one turkey cost 100 cacao beans and one fresh avocado was worth three beans. So if you factor in inflation, 25 US dollars for today’s Groupon gets you much more than 100 cacao beans (in their processed, chocolaty form) on the Chicago Chocolate Tour. On the tour, you’ll learn about fine chocolates, chocolate’s role in world history, and Chicago architecture from a tour guide made of chocolate.

But your Groupon doesn’t just get you an education. Throughout the tour, you’ll be fed copious amounts of rare and exquisite brown gobs, which will melt into ambrosial nectars in your mouth and then re-form back into cacao beans in your small intestine. Thus is the beautiful circle of chocolate.

The tour lasts a little more than two hours, and you can choose to explore the Magnificent Mile, Loop, or South Loop. Click here for tour routes and schedules. Delve into backstair chocolate bunkers like Canady Le Chocolatier and Teuscher Chocolates of Switzerland. Tour includes bacon chocolate for exotic nourishment and plenty of walking for exercise.

Reviews

People are fawning over the Chicago Chocolate Tour. Centerstage Chicago and CNN ate it up: > * The Chicago Chocolate Tour is a chocoholic’s dream come true, but it’s more than just a sampling of mouth-watering chocolate treats—although there’s plenty of that. The tour also dishes interesting tidbits about the history of chocolate and its production, as well as info about the companies that sell it, all wrapped up in one tasty package. – Albrey Nuss, Centerstage Chicago > * Romances come and go, but many a gourmand is in it for life with that addictive cocoa concoction, chocolate…the tours will provide guests with nuggets about the history and health benefits of chocolate, as well as more treats than most people can finish. – Marnie Hunter, CNN

Yelpers gobbled it up too, giving Chicago Chocolate Tours an average 4.5 stars:

• It was PERFECT. Part history lesson, part architectural tour, part binge. It was a great way to see the city… Which is to say, they are not stingy with the chocolate. Exotic chocolates. Sexy chocolates. Baconed chocolates. – Karlyn M.
• Anyone looking for a fun, unique Chicago outing should try a chocolate tour! – Katie T.
• Our tour guide was very helpful, knowledgeable and friendly. She was open to asking questions and did a great job walking a group of 12 people (all with different walking paces) around Michigan Ave/Water Tower Place, while dodging cabs and tourists. – Michelle L.

Which Chocolate Tour Is Right For Me?

With the recent influx of chocolate tour operators in Chicago (37 and counting), it’s become increasingly difficult to choose the right chocolate tour for you. Fortunately, today’s deal gets you 38% off the only Chicago chocolate tour that:

• Doesn’t highlight Mounds Bars or the 7-Eleven Chocolatier.
• Never fools you into taking a nap in order to encase you in an unbreakable chocolate shell.
• Doesn’t force-feed you cacao beans to harvest your plump, chocolatey liver for the delicious fois-chocolat black market.