What You'll Get
Jump to: Reviews | Rocks: America's Greatest Enemy
Because you never know when you'll end up scaling Teddy Roosevelt’s nose on Mt. Rushmore, today's Groupon to Earth Treks gets you a $17 Introduction to Climbing class, a $35 value.
Your three-hour introductory course will teach you the fundamentals of knot tying, belaying, and climbing. Classes are available at any of Earth Treks' three indoor climbing centers (in Columbia, Timonium, and Rockville) on Saturdays and Sundays from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. and Thursdays from 6:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. Once you've learned the ropes, pulleys, and sinister footholds, you'll have all the knowledge you need to create a wicked Rube Goldberg machine, perfect for making breakfast or creating a perpetual-motion machine.
Climbing in a rock gym is nothing like grappling the plywood-and-plastic climbing walls at a company picnic or dentist’s office. Rock gym walls are covered with state-of-the-art textured products that mimic the conditions of real rocks (indentions, protrusions, overhangs, underhangs, and cracks included). Veteran climbers say rock climbing is sort of like training and running a marathon, but you get the adrenaline rush in shorter, more intensely concentrated spurts and without all that unpopular running.
As you learn to climb rock, you might ponder what it would be like for the rock to climb you. After rock climbing enters your life, you may discover that you have trouble carrying out everyday tasks accurately, as you are unable to shift your consciousness away from the joys of rock climbing.
Reviews
Judy's Book users give Earth Treks' Timonium location 4.5 stars, and Insider Pages users give it a perfect five:
- She had me climbing on some of the simpler routes in no time at all—proof that it can be fun for the newest of novices. – Sarah A., Judy's Book
- ...there are numerous walls for all types of people. Great fun for everyone interested in climbing. Easy to get to from Baltimore Washington area. – andrew c., Insider Pages
- Come see this beautiful facility. The staff is very friendly and offer excellent instruction in this popular sport. – Anonymous, Insider Pages
Rocks: America’s Greatest Enemy
Since the dawn of time, Americans have battled one constant enemy: rocks. The mineral aggregates come in three, equally deadly varieties: Igneous, Metamorphic, and Dragonsbane.
Scientists blame rocks for the 1985 rock squashing of Richard Branson, the 1986 Toledo avalanche (which killed native son Jamie Farr), and the declining popularity of the Pledge of Allegiance. Luckily, Earth Treks uses its own faux-rock climbing walls, so Americans may finally experience the thrill of rock climbing without being flimflammed.
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The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Oct 30, 2010. Amount paid never expires. Ages 14 and up. Participants under 18 must have agreement signed by parent or legal guardian. Reservation required. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.