In ancient times, a hydro massage meant lying face-down in the sand and letting the ocean’s waves spasmodically pound against your back as tiny sand crabs scuttled across your spine in choreographed strokes. Harness the power of the tides with today’s Groupon: for $15, you get a 30-minute hydro massage at Intersport Fitness Center (a $30 value).

Sturdy hydro hands abolish aches and muscle spasms in a DynaMed T2000 massage bed featuring custom programs for several muscular maladies. Though it looks like a tanning bed, the T2000 eschews solar rays for rolling waves and vibrating jet streams that repair tissue and soothe wobbly sea legs. Fully clothed guests can dive into the warm massage bed, dialing their personal settings into the on-board computer for specialized tidal sequences in detoxification, pre- and post-operative stress relief, and body contouring. An aromatherapy and audio program enlist a full-sensory palette, sweeping stress away with the salty smells of windswept beaches and the sounds of sirens singing in the distance.

With a 17,000-square-foot weight room and a host of other club amenities, Intersport Fitness Center seamlessly incorporates massage therapy into an overarching mission of total health and fitness.