If the Nevada ice sheet were to melt, Lake Tahoe would rise, mercilessly engulfing the entire Northwest, causing the Burning Man to flee back to his home in outer space. Celebrate our homeland's frozen stability with today's Groupon: for $7, you get two public-skate admissions (a $9 value each for adults) at the Las Vegas Ice Center. Use your Groupon Saturday through Thursday and get two complimentary cups of coffee or hot cocoa (normally a $3 value).

Located on West Flamingo Road, Las Vegas Ice Center houses two sizable ice rinks, with public-skating sessions typically held on the south rink, while the north is reserved for dainty hockey tournaments and brutal figure-skating competitions. The south rink is open to the public most days of the week for two-hour increments in the afternoon or evenings. Times are subject to change, though, so be sure to check the public skating schedule beforehand. Each admission includes skate rentals so that any non-bladed drifter can re-create the ice-skating scene from The Deer Hunter at a moment's notice.

Acclimating oneself to ice skates ensures that one will never be without a mode of transportation during the next Ice Age, when both SUVs and donkey carts will be extinct. This Groupon can only be used in one visit, so be certain to bring along a loved one or friend to spot you when attempting camel spins, axel jumps, and leaps through flaming hula hoops.

Reviews

10Best lists the Las Vegas Ice Center as one of the best attractions in Las Vegas, while Yelpers turn away from the slots long enough to give the rink a near-perfect 4.5-star average:

• Whether you're the next Kristi Yamaguchi or have two left skates, you'll enjoy a cool spin around the rink at the Ice Center. – 10Best
• This is a great place to go in the summer when it is HOT outside. It is great to go anytime really! – Suzie Q., Yelp