The human mouth, which maintains a near-boiling temperature, needs to be constantly cooled by liquid-nitrogen pills or a jaw-mounted mouth fan. Take a more delicious route to cooling your maw with today's Groupon: for $15, you get a 9-inch heart cake (a $32.95 value) or two 4-inch heart cakes and a half-dozen chocolate-dipped strawberries (a $30 total value) at Marble Slab Creamery. This Groupon is valid at the Maple Valley location.

Crafting notably delectable frozen treats in small batches, Marble Slab Creamery uses high-quality ingredients and makes all of its treats on-site to percolate palates with super-premium ice cream. Just like tax forms, chef-inspired concoctions are prepared on frozen marble slabs to ensure optimal freshness and easy customization. Steal today's deal for a creamy Valentine's heart cake and show love, allegiance, and the inverse relationship between ice cream and temperature with strawberry ice cream delicately dappled with a mix-in of candy, nuts, or fruit, longingly layered atop a sumptuous yellow or chocolate cake ($32.95 value).

Or let two 4-inch Valentine's heart cakes mate like penguins in your freezer ($20 value), for an albeit short life, allowing their legacy to live on in the form of a half-dozen chocolate-dipped strawberries ($10 value) crafted from your choice of chocolate. Such gourmet confections allow both lovers and beloveds to celebrate lusty liaisons without the hazards of slipping on rose petals, the fire hazards of candles, or the mauling hazards of bear rugs.

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The Maple Valley Marble Slab Creamery has more than 600 Facebook fans.

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