Ancient cultures revered mountains as the homes of gods, refusing to climb them out of fear that they would interrupt Zeus during a bubble bath. Drop in on a deity with today's Groupon: for $50, you get a four-hour beginner climbing class at Mountain Madness Rock Climbing School (a $110 value). This Groupon is valid for classes at Reimers Ranch in Dripping Springs and at Seismic Wall in the Barton Creek Greenbelt.
Mountain Madness Rock Climbing School unites aspiring alpinists with the proper knowledge and techniques required to scale the Earth's most inconvenient planes. Over the past 29 years, its professional obstacle-ascending guides have trained more than 13,000 climbers and maintained a commitment to climbers' safety. Beginners will meet for Rock Climbing 1 on Saturday mornings (8 a.m. to 12 p.m.) or afternoons (1 p.m. to 5 p.m.) at either location to learn the fundamentals of friction and crack climbing, and to test their vertical abilities on roped climbs of up to 100 feet. Though Mountain Madness provides all of the equipment necessary to tackle the upright terrain, each climber should bring a small backpack stocked with food, at least two liters of water, and a giant alphorn for serenading faraway sweethearts.
During four-hour sessions, guides will work with groups of up to six climbers to ensure safety in each climb. Mountaineering neophytes can purchase an additional Groupon to give Mother Nature a much-needed massage at both the Dripping Springs and Barton Creek locations.