Left to its own devices, your carpet hoards dirt, hair, grime, and used cars, eventually transforming into a full-fledged junkyard overrun with angry raccoons. Keep the outdoors out of your indoors with today's Groupon: for $59, you get a basic carpet cleaning in three rooms up to 300 square feet each from Mr. Steamer (a $120 value).

The professional carpet-cleaning technicians at Mr. Steamer design personalized services to freshen unsightly patches of floor fur in southeast Pennsylvania. Their exclusive Oxy-H2O cleaning compound effectively relieves ground toupees of dirt, stains, and harmful particles such as pollen and miniature landmines set in place by colonies of sub-sofa invaders. In addition to the natural, non-toxic compound, Mr. Steamer employs a deodorizing enzyme treatment to eliminate bacteria and remove odors.

Groupon holders can choose to take 25% off additional deodorizing and protecting services. One of ten scent options can replace the pungent perfumes of children, pets, and ceiling-fan oil changes. Further, to prevent carpets from hoarding contaminants, the Scotchguard carpet protector can re-enforce fibers with an invisible coating that repels spills and helps to thwart the plans of future stains.