If you've ever sat beside a roaring fire, wishing its flame fingers would reach out and massage your aches and pains away, today's Groupon gives you all the warmth of a fire massage without the uncomfortable burns: for $42, you get a 60-minute hot-stone massage at Oasis Salon and Spa in Bossier City (up to a $95 value).

Licensed massage therapist Crystal Ashworth banishes achy muscles and stress-laden psyches during a 60-minute hot-stone massage. Thermodynamically excited rocks impart heat deep into musculature, releasing built-up tension from stressful day jobs or nights spent trying to unwind in attic crawlspaces. Ashworth's nimble fingers deftly rub away stress, expelling ache-making toxins, unfurling painful knots, and transporting minds into blissfully relaxed reveries. Massages take place in a tranquil spa environment, which encourages even the most tightly wound nerves to evolve into states of adorable, koala-like dormancy.