Since great aunts cannot resist pinching dimpled cheeks, the overwhelming number of dimples on a golf ball should confuse their grabby hands—defeating them once and for all. Drive dimpled dandies back into their holes with today's deal: for $18, you can play two rounds of golf ($9 per game on weekdays, $13 on weekends) at the stunning 18-hole Paradise Valley Golf Course, with golf cart rental included ($6 per person for 18 holes). This Groupon can be split between two golfers, but must be redeemed in one visit.

Paradise Valley Golf Course's luscious "chip and putt" par-3 course provides an excellent place for beginners to get a grasp on the game, yet it also allows veteran golfers to hone their short game. Golf is a sport of physical precision and aerial dynamics, won and lost upon the pendulum of your swing. Brush up on your golf physics with a links crash course, as each formidable hole is less than 100 yards in length, and completely free of beatniks. Masterfully avoid stepping on cracks that break mothers' backs by rolling over them (mothers, that is) in the included golf cart ($6 per person for 18 holes). Call to schedule your tee time in between tea time and your T-ball tournament.