Like competitive sports, modern dance requires focused commitment, natural athleticism, and ceremonial face paint. Gear up for a war with the floor with today’s Groupon: for $25, you get $100 worth of dance lessons at Premier Wedding Dances.

Premier Wedding Dances' accredited instructors impart the secrets to sultry slow dances and impassioned tangos to patrons in time for nuptial performances. Packages cater to betrothed couples seeking extensive choreography or expedited elegance. The Amethyst package ($100/couple) guides up to five couples through four sessions of basic slow-dance techniques, including turns, dips, and removing rose thorns from between teeth. Five to seven private lessons comprise the Ruby package ($52.50/lesson) and engage students in the prerequisite meanderings of the waltz, fox trot, and tango. Those seeking last-minute liberation from shameful scuttling may partake in the Pearl package’s ($55/lesson) one- to four-lesson crash course. Triumphant couples have proudly documented their hardwood adventures in a shared series of videos and commemorative dinner plates.