Beyoncé Should Luge. She Already Has the Outfit.

BY: DANIELLE MALLOY | 1.16.2014 |

Beyoncé Should Luge. She Already Has the Outfit.Beyoncé can do no wrong. We imagine how she could repurpose her wardrobe to win Best Dressed in Sochi.

If singing were a sport, Beyoncé would have her fair share of gold medals. At 32, she’s racked up a lifetime’s worth of career accomplishments: she’s won 17 Grammys, sold tens of millions of albums, performed at two presidential inaugurations, and, most prestigiously, landed a starring role in this Vizio commercial.

But if Queen Bey wants an actual gold medal, she’s going to have to earn it the old-fashioned way. Luckily for her, a number of her most memorable outfits translate remarkably well to the ice, the luge track, and the slopes. In fact, if Beyoncé does make a triumphant showing in Sochi, it will only seem surprising if you haven’t been paying attention to her style.

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Figure Skater Beyoncé

With its dramatic pearl epaulettes and partial peplum overskirt, this embellished leotard could easily pass as a figure-skating dress. Add some snow-white skates, and Bey’s ready to land a few triple axels (and maybe some backflips, too).


Luge Beyoncé

This dazzling sapphire-blue bodysuit is so tight it looks painted on. Luckily, that translates well to the luge track, where Bey complements the aerodynamic suit with a helmet and pointy-toe stilettos luge spikes.


Hockey Goalie Beyoncé

Looking like a sexy C-3PO, Beyoncé is well protected from pucks and errant flying teeth in this surprisingly form-fitting robot suit. Since this armored costume already has a helmet, once Bey slips on skates, a face mask, and gloves, she’s ready to tend goal.


Downhill-Skiing Beyoncé

Add sleeves to this spiderweb-like bodysuit and it’s ready for competition on the slopes. (Even Bey can’t make hypothermia look good.) With a helmet, goggles, skis, and poles, she’s all set to dart down a mountain or carve “Hi Blue Ivy” in the snow.

Illustration: Dav Yendler, Groupon

Guide Staff Writer
BY: Danielle Malloy Guide Staff Writer