From catapulting flaming soldiers over castle walls to sitting on active geysers, humans have long been fixated on flying through the air. Absorb the wonderment of flight with today’s Groupon: for $69, you get a 30-minute introductory jumbo-jet flight simulation at Coastal Pacific Aviation (a $150 value), located on Approach Drive at the Abbotsford Airport.

For more than 30 years, Coastal Pacific Aviation has taught altitudinal abecedarians the methods of airliner helming. A licensed flight instructor will escort you through a unique 30-minute introductory tutorial to replicate the operational motions of a jumbo jet with greater accuracy than pointing a fan at your face while sprawling on a table Superman-style. Aerial coxswains maintain control of the simulation from beginning to end as they settle into the captain’s chair of a Boeing 747 simulator concordant with the ones used to prime pilots-in-training for the high skies. For a more encyclopedic session, Groupies can add an extra half-hour for an additional $100 fee.