Prior to dentists, humans were forced to shine their own teeth with fleets of flea-driven miniature Zambonis. Appreciate modern advantages with today's Groupon: for $35, you get x-rays, an exam, and a cleaning at Estrella Falls Dentistry in Goodyear.

A mélange of mouth parts is kept in working order by Dr. Suaverdez and the team at Estrella Falls Dentistry. X-rays reveal teeth's innermost thoughts ($111), and help identify anything from cysts and tumors to crooked roots and subcutaneous pyramid schemes.

The dental exam assesses x-rays and screens the face, neck, lips, tongue, throat, tissues, and gums for signs of cancer ($79). A thorough cleaning ($80) issues stuck-on tartar a cease-and-desist order and shakes sticky plaque before it becomes a bacteria-laden buzzkill. A gentle polish can cause tooth-stain breakups, forcing disheartened discolorations to console themselves with misery-indulging indie-rock jams.

Vision-shattering smiles stand out against Estrella Falls Dentistry’s warm mocha walls and are reflected off shiny stone counters and tile floors. Dismantle accruing nerves by nestling in a cushy chair and reading chair-assembly manuals in the calming confines of the waiting room.