Answering the seductive call of the sea has rewarded many men with a watery grave, and even more with an unexpected mouth full of water. Shut your porthole and jump in with today’s Groupon: for $30, you get a two-hour guided group standup paddleboard tour from Stoke Harvester (a $70 value). Tours generally begin at 10 a.m. and 6 p.m.

Stoke Harvester’s friendly instructors teach landlubbers the ways of Hawaiian standup paddleboarding by guiding them through scenic tours of Puget Sound. During the two-hour tour, paddle-wielding participants follow the lead of an experienced water walker as they glide through picturesque waterways on their boards like a warm knife through a snowman’s abdomen. Stoke Harvester furnishes each paddleboard newbie with a board, paddle, and personal floatation device for the lesson. Each group is generally limited to five participants, letting paddlers enjoy more one-on-one time with instructors and the safety of traveling in an intimidating floating V arrangement.