If your shady parking spot rests beneath bird-filled trees, or someone scrawled carpetbagger into the inch of dirt on your car window, Absolute Perfection Auto Services can give your vehicle its original off-the-lot shine. With today's Groupon, you'll get a Wet n' Wax Express from Absolute Perfection for $49 (normally $79 for a car, $99 for an SUV).
While it's true that a dirty, junk-filled car is the best deterrent to carjackers, pigeons, and professional wrestlers, the gunky condition destroys your car's self-esteem. Absolute Perfection's Wet n' Wax Express prevents this unsightly downward spiral with an executive wash, express waxing, carpet shampooing, vacuuming, and deodorization. After 60–90 minutes—most of which you can spend admiring the Ferraris, Mercedes, and Harleys in AP's showroom—your car's paint will look as lustrous as the day it was first applied, while its interior will be as new-car-smelly as the day you bought it.
Most people wait until their car develops its own ecosystem before deciding it's time to clean. Let the Absolute Perfection staff, with their years of detailing experience and knowledge of the latest techniques, wade into the mess to give your car a better cleaning job than you could give it. You never know when you might have to drive your boss to an across-town meeting. Today's deal eliminates the need for constant apology on your unexpected drive; instead, let your passengers apologize to you.
Absolute Perfection has a near-perfect four stars on Yelp:
- I am, for once in my life, SPEECHLESS...The truck is sparkling like a diamond and every nook and cranny is cleaner than the day we bought it. – Jacqueline Q.
Absolute Perfection may do a great job on your car, but the staff should remember popular mug-mantra and Martin Van Buren campaign slogan: Podody’s Nerfect. Van Buren certainly lived up to his slogan, but he’s not the only one. Here are other presidential screw-ups:
- James Buchanan: Went missing for seven months during a game of hide-and-seek.
- Andrew Johnson: Accidentally blew up the White House with one of his chemistry experiments; quickly built a new one out of popsicle sticks before anyone noticed.
- Chester A. Arthur: Spent his first three years in office believing he was the butt of an elaborate fake president practical joke.
- John Tyler: Made the mistake of being totally unmemorable.
- William Howard Taft: Was shamed when word leaked out that while in office he also wrote mystery novels under the name Howard William Banicutt with such lurid titles as Sensual President and The Sensual President Investigates a Frisky Ghost.
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