Though its primary purpose remains disrupting college lectures and movie screenings, laser light has also proven useful in the precise removal of human hair. Today's smooth-making Groupon lets you reap the benefits of America's favorite repurposed supervillain weapon: for $99, you get six GentleLASE laser hair removal treatments (up to a $750 value) at BodyTrends in Stonebriar Mall or The Village. This Groupon is valid for the upper lip ($450), chin ($450), eyebrows ($450), sideburns ($200), or underarms ($750). Visitors may also acquire additional Groupons to upgrade treatments for other body areas. Treatments are not effective on blond hair, grey hair, red hair, or snake hair.
BodyTrends has successfully harnessed the power of skin-smoothing science to shed soul sacks of shaggy follicles thanks to potent GentleLASE hair removal technology. Utilizing intense pulses of light, GentleLASE's high-energy beams target follicles at their source—removing hair far more painlessly than the industry standard practice of launching patrons off trampolines onto giant sheets of flypaper. Six effective treatments targeting the upper lip, chin, eyebrows, sideburns or underarms will leave customers sleek enough to lure schools of admiring dolphins during snorkeling sessions. In the process, you can soak in BodyTrends' relaxingly rustic décor and pinkish hues.
Though once useful for intimidating the predatory cactus and surviving long winters of Coach reruns, most body hairs have overstayed their evolutionary welcome. Strut confidently with 21st century smoothness courtesy of today’s Groupon to BodyTrends.
Call ahead to schedule an appointment. There is a 24-hour cancellation policy or scheduled treatment will be forfeited.
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The aestheticians at BodyTrends specialize in nonsurgical Electrospa treatments that have toned and beautified the bodies of beauty-pageant contestants. By stimulating muscles with gentle electrical currents, technicians can mimic the effects of a face-lift or breast lift without ever breaking the scalpel out of its emergency glass. Lasers erase unwanted hair, veins, cellulite, and tattoos, and facial services banish blemishes while adorning features with MNA and mineral cosmetics. For feelings of inner peace, BodyTrends' massage therapists capture tension from bodies and release it deep in the woods to plague overly frivolous nymphs.