Although teeth-baring is considered a threat in the animal world, humans perceive it as an affectionate indication that they are about to be eaten. Ensure a stain-free smile with today’s deal: for $119, you get a custom take-home teeth-whitening kit at Drs. Louis & Dominic Vitangeli, with proceeds benefiting Smiles for Hope.

Father-and-son dentist duo Louis and Dominic Vitangeli fit patrons with reusable custom-molded teeth-whitening trays. Once they get home, patients simply fill the trays with whitening formula—which bolsters tooth enamel and renders dull, discolored teeth into interplanetary communication devices—and relax in front of a roaring fire before remembering that their home doesn't have a fireplace. The length of treatment will depend on current mouth-bone shade and how blinding a shade is desired, but people generally wear their trays several hours a day for two weeks.

Smiles for Hope is a global alliance of dentists committed to promoting oral health in the world's poorest countries via charitable work and dissemination of anti-frown propaganda. Smiles for Hope will donate a portion of proceeds to Smiles for Life so that the organization can send Dr. Dominic Vitangeli on a mission trip to do dental work in villages throughout the Dominican Republic.