Establishing a regular exercise routine is a great way to show your body you care and is much less painful than swallowing a greeting card. Enjoy your health without the risk of choking with today's Groupon: for $49, you get a one-month membership and two personal-training sessions at Gold's Gym in Springfield or Chicopee (up to a $167 value).

Originally founded more than 45 years ago, Gold's Gym promotes a results-oriented approach to personal fitness. Members can explore their robustness goals with the gym's extensive collection of ellipticals, treadmills, resistance machines, weights, and other fitness gadgets, as well as group classes such as Zumba, spinning, yoga and more, which facilitate social sweating. Check out the class schedules at both Springfield and Chicopee locations.

Over the course of two complimentary 30-minute sessions, Gold's Gym’s certified personal trainers can provide nutrition consultations, workout motivation, and personalized exercise plans to make muscles burn with satisfaction, like an insult uttered from the lips of a sarcastic fire swallower.