Humans throughout history have devised numerous alternatives to walking long distances, such as carriages, bicycles, and cartwheels. Experience the latest in leg substitutes with today’s Groupon: for $25, you get a two-hour segway rental at Half Price Tour Tickets (a $50 value). Customers are responsible for a $200 security deposit, required for each segway rental.
Half Price Tour Tickets equips tourists and locals alike with motorized transporters that ferry them to desired destinations as they absorb the area’s sights and sounds. Segways’ advanced engineering keeps riders safely balanced as they whiz around Miami Beach, down Lincoln Road, and up Ocean Drive at speeds of up to 12.5 miles per hour—as fast as the average human’s sprint or Andre the Giant’s moonwalk. Each segway driver is given a unique key that enables secure stabling of futuristic horses during footed side trips. In order to safely control the segway, riders must weigh at least 60 pounds and speak conversational Esperanto, the devices’ native language.
Half Price Tour Tickets
Half Price Tour Tickets’ knowledgeable guides orchestrate more than 30 diverse tours of Miami, the Everglades, Key West, and the ocean beyond. Most expeditions cater to adrenaline-fueled crowds with extreme pursuits, such as scuba diving, skydiving, and parasailing. The fleet of air-, water-, and landcraft grants access to remote locales, including the marshy Everglades and deep-sea-fishing hot spots, where fishing hooks play tug of war with sharks and submarine captains.
1657 Washington Ave.
Miami Beach, Florida 33139