Without backs, humans would have nothing to protect them from encroaching water balloons, or serve as a canvas for tattoos they want to forget about. Give your aqua-battle shield a tune-up with today’s Groupon: for $39, you get one exam, x-rays (if needed), relief treatment, consultation, non-needle acupuncture, and an adjustment at Island Chiropractic (up to a $555 value). Services must be redeemed over a period of two separate visits.
Island Chiropractic realigns crooked spines and blocked chi, allowing clients with various ailments to restore their health with noninvasive, drug-free techniques. The first visit examines your spinal column (a $180 value)—taking x-rays if necessary (a $215 value)—in search of pesky subluxations, or misplaced vertebrae that can impinge the nerves’ ability to carry signals down the spine and into the body’s muscles, organs, and glands, potentially causing decreased resistance to disease and other imbalances. After ascertaining the root of the problem, the first visit ends with a relief treatment (a $45 value) to soothe any pain the patient is experiencing.
The second treatment commences with the five-millennia-old Chinese art of acupuncture (a $55 value), but using nonpiercing needles or metal balls to restore points of body-energy occlusion, so that no secrets or strong opinions about the chiropractor’s hairstyle accidently seep out through patient’s skin. Highly specialized techniques, or adjustments (a $60 value), put the vertebrae back where they belong, and occasionally give patients the ability to glow in the dark. Finally, the chiropractor gives recommendations to each client, which usually take the form of handy plumbing tips.