What You'll Get
While pen names provide paper-thin disguises for acclaimed authors, roller-derby names provide sentient battering rams with the human alias needed to enter athletic competitions. Witness the ruthlessness of flat-tracked epithets with today’s Groupon: for $6, you get one general-admission ticket to Providence Roller Derby at the Rhode Island Convention Center (a $10 advanced value or $15 at the door). Choose from three dates:
- Saturday, May 21 at 7 p.m.: Rhode Island Riveters vs. Dutchland Derby Rollers
- Saturday, June 18 at 4 p.m.: Rhode Island Riveters vs. Poe's Punishers
- Saturday, August 13 at 5 p.m.: Rhode Island Riveters vs. Montreal New Skids on the Block and Killah Bees vs. Montreal Les Sexpos
A skater-owned organization, Providence Roller Derby rewards wheeled shareholders and raucous spectators with fiercely competitive action, clever rink wear, and stamina-demanding athleticism. Pack into the Rhode Island Convention Center for 60 minutes of skate-clad action as the league's two traveling teams defend home hardwood against swift interlopers. Co-captains Hot Apply Cry and Hot Sauce lead the red-kerchiefed Riveters into tilts against the Dutchland Derby Rollers’ All-Star team and the raven-aided Poe's Punishers to settle simmering rivalries and arguments over the proper treatment for rink rash. Undefeated in 2010, the Killah Bees join the Riveters for a late-summer doubleheader against the forces of French Canada in a skate-aided intercontinental incident.
Fans track every bruising block and stealthy snipers from the rowdy confines of general-admission seating, where crowds cheer on home-team skaters and cheerleaders taunt rivals with pom-poms made of bandages from past bouts.
Though Providence Roller Derby offers tickets for kids 12 and younger at a discounted rate, this Groupon is the best deal available for adult general admission.
The Fine Print
Expiration varies. Amount paid never expires. Limit 10 per person. Valid only for date purchased. Non-transferable. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.