Prior to dentists, humans were forced to shine their own teeth with fleets of flea-driven miniature zambonis. Use the latest tools to shimmer up your smile with today's Groupon: for $69, you get an exam, cleaning, x-rays, and a mouth facial at Rejuvenation Dentistry on Park Avenue (a $380 value).
A contributor to the Fox News health blog and featured in Vogue and Glow, Dr. Gerry Curatola focuses his practice around aesthetic dentistry and total wellness. Instead of treating each mouth as an isolated mechanical food funnel in need of a tune-up, Dr. Curatola and his staff emphasize the mouth as a vital piece of overall health and beauty. With this deal, patients get a thorough exam, insightful X-rays, a meticulous cleaning, and a mouth facial to give teeth and gums the luxurious treatment the face has selfishly withheld from them all its life. With the mouth facial, choppers can relax while they're bathed in antioxidants, nine homeopathic compounds, and a vitamin-laden gel mask that'll boost oral immune system and rejuvenate gum tissue weary from any cactus-pie-eating contests.