What You'll Get
In addition to the humiliation of being buried by dogs and dug up by science teachers, skeletons are ornery because they lack the musculature necessary to get massaged. Avoid taking your skin for granted with today's Groupon: for $50, you get a 60-minute Swedish massage, 30-minute facial, and 30-minute seaweed mud wrap (a $100 total value) at the Relaxation Station in Ingleside.
Amid classy, welcoming confines that feature soothing, earthy tones, guests can wind down while seasoned relaxation pros grapple with knots that are deeply embedded in the body. Each anxiety-annihilating odyssey begins with a 60-minute Swedish massage which kneads and relieves muscles, loosening them up enough to be molded into muscle-animals by the therapist's skilled hands (a $40 value). Once bodies give off the pulsating neon-green glow of perfect tranquility, visages join in with a full facial that cleanses the skin of grease, gently exfoliates dead cells, and re-moisturizes each radiantly resurfaced epidermis before treating both the face and scalp to their own full massages (a $30 value). The 30-minute seaweed mud wrap closes out the pampering hat trick by encasing clients in an enriching mud designed to nourish skin and detoxify the body (a $30 value). Slathered in mud containing vitamins and sea-donated salt and seaweed, bodies roll into contented muddy burritos within a heat-retaining wrap, emerging with diminished wrinkles, fewer toxins, and the ability to finally relate to mermaids.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Oct 25, 2011. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1 per person, may buy 1 additional as a gift. Limit 1 per visit. By appointment only. Valid only for listed service. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.