Although outdoor tanning allows humans to absorb the sun's natural energy, the sapped star will eventually turn pale and suffer the fate of Earth's original sun, the moon. Save the sun with today's Groupon: for $38, you get two double-dip spray tans at Tan-talyzing Tan (a $90 value).
Eluding the harmful UV rays of traditional sun-drawn bronzing techniques and tanning beds, Tan-talyzing Tan's safe airbrush service imbues dull skin with complexion-resurrecting color. Prior to each spritzing session, certified airbrushing experts muddle a custom-blended formula, taking into account clients' skin tones as well as the frequency with which they plan to pose as a copper statue. The organic tanning solution is the same recipe used to bronze bods on ABC's Dancing with the Stars and The Real Housewives of Orange County. Each spray evenly distributes skin with microdroplets of color, imbuing epidermises with a golden sheen that shuns streaks and orange-tinged hues. Tan-talyzing Tan's melanin whisperers will coat clients twice in order to ensure that they don't miss hard-to-reach spots between the toes or beneath the clown nose.