The world as we know it could end any moment—probably because people aren't using enough oil so the earth's crust is filling up with it. Whatever happens, the end of the world will only be a new beginning for people who were smart enough to stock up their underground bunkers. Here are some supplies you’ll want in your apocalypse-proof lair:

• Dishwashing soap to clean off any animals that got covered in ash from the global fire so they are edible again
  

• Handheld video games (brain-teaser games only!)
  

• Three quarts of gasoline to keep grandpa’s heart running
  

• Two sacks of raw grain to use as free weights so you’ll look buff when intruders from other bunkers break in and try to steal your sacks of grain
  

• A bunch of different-colored cardigans—stuff them with newspaper and now they’re friends
  

• A lantern for pretending it’s the sun and hoping it grows large enough to replace the sun we lost
  

• Bunk beds for keeping sleeping family members all stacked up in an orderly fashion so you feel like you have control over at least this one thing