If humans are mostly made of water, and fish traditionally inhabit water, fish should naturally occur in the human body. Fix this gap in nature’s logic with today’s Groupon to King Kone in Miami Beach. Choose between the following options:
• For $15, you get $30 worth of sushi-kone dinner for two people.
• For $30, you get $60 worth of sushi-kone dinner for four people.
The fish masters at King Kone hand-roll a menu full of fresh fish, rice, and veggies into cone-shaped delights designed for munching on the go. Instead of stuffing a trout into a waffle cone, guests can stuff seaweed “kones” with their choice of fillings from an array of veggies, toppings, and 11 meats ($5.99–$7.99 depending on size), making medleys such as salmon-scallion-cucumber and tuna-jalapeño-potato. House-specialty Crown kones ($5.99–$7.99 depending on size) quash tummy growling with rock shrimp or salmon, and Shock kones ($5.99–$7.99 depending on size) dazzle taste buds with eel and avocado. A soda and side transform lonely kones into satisfying combos ($7.99–$9.99 depending on size), which arrive on patrons' mouth-steps in a matter of minutes. Diners can also net more traditional cylindrical sushi rolled in white or brown rice ($6.99) and sashimi lovingly sculpted in Jacques Cousteau’s likeness.
For guests who can't walk and chew sushi, the inviting restaurant boasts a flat-screen TV, inviting visitors to cheer on local sports teams while sipping bottles of sake ($7.99) and Japanese beer ($4.99). Cheery orange chairs lure impatient eaters to the sushi bar’s culinary magic show, where crabs morph into bite-size cubes and chefs make octopi disappear inside their seaweed top hats.