Washing a car, like playing golf, is best done in shorts and not in a bedroom. Let professionals find a proper spot with today's Groupon: for $15, you get a deluxe-ultra-experience car wash (a $37.87 value) at Magnotta's Car Wash & Detail Center.

Magnotta's pampers horseless carriages with brushless Neoglide technology that whisks away dirt and grime alike while protecting each car's finish. The deluxe ultra experience gently guides vehicles through an exterior wash accompanied by a towel dry that wipes away a car’s tears of joy. Staff members vacuum the interior, beautify the windows inside and out, and clean the doorjambs, ashtrays, rubber mats, dashboard, and old socks hang-drying on the antenna. A super-express Black Magic treatment gives tires a vehicular pedicure as the super-express Rain-X application glazes the windshield to protect against even the fullest of water balloons. The two-step, super-express wax service forces foamed wax onto the surface of the car, where it is then ambushed and imprisoned by a sealant for a maximum sentence of 30 days.

A professional wash at Magnotta's maintains environmental harmony by utilizing less than half the water typically sprayed about at an average driveway wash. Wash water from Magnotta's embarks on a carefully charted quest to a wastewater-treatment plant to ensure that none of it finds itself polluting local rivers or lakes, and the dirt gingerly lifted from autos finds its destiny fulfilled as cover at landfills or being recycled for use at asphalt plants.