Studies show that your face is the part of your body least likely to wear shoes and most likely to consume Funyuns. Reward this hard-working frontispiece with today's Groupon: for $55, you get a four-layer vitamin-C facelift (a $135 value) from Aegean Advanced Aesthetics, located just north of Fig Garden Village Shopping Center.

For almost two decades, the passionate dermal custodians at Aegean Advanced Aesthetics have combined top-shelf clinical products and professional care to energize orifices and invigorate visages. Today's Groupon smoothes over each face's troubled past with a rejuvenating four-layer vitamin-C facelift. In one 60-minute sitting, a friendly attendant will affix your skull sheath with coats of vitamin C, glycolic acid, and gentle enzymes, speeding up cellular turnover to tighten and enliven your face, as well as emit an incandescence unseen since Zeus removed a T-shirt from his lamp to reveal the sun. Upon completion, feel free to consult the face sages for how to maintain your ultra-radiant luminescence. After all, taking good care of your skin is important at any age. When future forms of facial recognition require a scan of your face before you can enter your hovercraft or open a can of hovercraft fuel with your automatic can-opener, it’ll be nice to know you’re dependably radiant. Call ahead to make an appointment.