With your kitchen's pots and pans inhabited by the evil spirits of dead pots and pans, cooking at home has become both time consuming and spooky. Get quality cuisine without interference from crazed kitchenware with today's Groupon: for $27, you get lunch or dinner for two including two chicken or beef kebab entrees (up to a $12 value each), two glasses of wine (up to a $6.50 value each), and two desserts (up to an $8.75 value each) at Neto Caffé & Bakery in Mountain View (up to a $54.50 total value).

Neto's skewer-brandishing culinarians craft a menu brimming with dishes that fuse Mediterranean and contemporary European flavors, an assortment of wine, and a lineup of house-made desserts. Peruse the collection of Salmon Creek wines, dotted with varietals such as pinot grigio, pinot noir, chardonnay, and merlot before sharpening your fangs on harpooned morsels of a chicken shish kebab or charbroiled cubes of the beef shish kebab, both accompanied by a duo of jasmine rice and salad made from noncloned vegetables. An arrangement of European desserts, such as Belgian chocolate mousse, cheesecake, or a lemon tart, acts as a sacchariferous coda to meals.

Sink into one of Neto’s cushy booths trimming the tangerine-hued walls or opt for a sturdy chair to indulge in prime views of the vibrant and modern artwork adorning the café. An outdoor patio allows for an authentic alfresco dining experience, complete with views of the great outdoors and organic oxygen molecules culled fresh from an air farm.