Flutter peepers as if they were freshly hatched hummingbirds, wiggle brows like decocooning caterworms, and plough a fallow face to give the hummingbird an advantage in the upcoming race against the caterworm with today's Groupon. For $32, you get $65 worth of waxing, eyelash extensions, or facials from The Eyelash Connection. Have your keratin phalanges stuck or plucked at its clean and comfortable Spring Valley studio. This deal is not valid toward products.

Nine out of ten eyelashes agree that eyelashes are an incredibly attractive and highly alluring attribute, so slap on some sensuously curved full-bodied eye-scimitars to rapidwoo 4–6 caballeros per blink. Eyelash Connection's licensed and insured aestheticians will guarantee that you'll be seen seeing and being seen at dances, bars, and other fancy locales where it's impossible for admirers with tiny, tiny eyelashes to make significant eye contact from afar. Adhere a full top set of semi-permanent waterproof lashes for $250, or just take care of the bottom lid and go topless for $75. If your hairdeology is "less is more," shed strands with an eyebrow ($25+), back ($55), or bikini-line wax ($30+). Or opt for a classic European facial ($65), which emphasizes relaxation, or a deep-cleansing facial ($65), which dispatches a series of microscopic unmanned submersibles to extract toxins and acne-causing impurities from the depths of pores.

All The Eyelash Connection's tools and machines are sterilized between each treatment; the lavish services are sure to be safe and hygienic. The staff of friendly aestheticians welcomes feedback and suggestions from clients, so don't be shy about requesting a wax in the shape of the Ford Model T. Call ahead to schedule an appointment.