Adding water results in less floury biscuits, larger foam dinosaurs, and slides that won't give a shirtless cousin friction burn. Keep your home’s water slides clean with today's Groupon: for $49, you get $350 toward an Aquafer Watersource whole-house water conditioner from Vibrant Water Engineering. This Groupon is valid within 100 miles of zip code 92081.

Vibrant Water Engineering's patented Aquafer filters out calcified particles and contaminates before they reach residential waterways. Using catalytic and magnetic force, the conditioning tank (starting at $1,795 for a 2,200 sq. ft. home) eliminates pipe-clogging crud, chlorine, heavy metals such as lead, and microbial commuter trains before they enter faucet-bound tunnels. Installation starts at $150, and once installed, this maintenance-free system ably deploys its chemical- and salt-free powers for several years, allowing homeowners to effectively quench the thirst of one baobab tree or mix a googolplex of Tang packets.