The opposable thumb has allowed humans to use hammers, engage in hand-to-hand combat, and quickly outline turkey silhouettes onto almost any Revolutionary War–era document. Today's Groupon lets you eat with your built-in stampers: for $6, you get $12 worth of fresh wings, sandwiches, non-alcoholic drinks, and more at Wing King in Kerrville.
Along with its signature fresh wings, Wing King doles out homemade, cooked-to-order grub, such as hearty sandwiches and certified Angus-ground-beef burgers. King Wings (6 for $5.99) or Party Wings (10 for $6.49) come either naked or clothed in a variety of appetizing outfits, including hot, hotter, lemon pepper, cocktail dresses, and teriyaki. The pulled-pork sandwich dazzles salivary glands with slow-cooked meat slathered in barbecue sauce in a toasted roll ($6.49). Armadillo eggs—a mixture of fresh ground beef, sausage, cheeses, and spices stuffed into jalapeño peppers and deep-fried—prep pre-meal palates ($6.99), and the fried Twinkie finishes dinners on a brazenly sweet note ($4.99). Dine in to devour Wing King's human fuel in front of one of the eatery's nine flat-screen TVs or take orders to go to challenge your bathroom mirror to a one-on-none eating contest.