For one month every year, people get together to celebrate wedding season. Get in the mood with these creative proposal proposals:

• Put her name as "WIFE" on the bowling machine.
  
• If your partner uses medically prescribed foot cream, put the ring somewhere near that.
  
• Have 300 custom-made paintballs with wedding rings inside, then spend the day surprise-shooting your future spouse.
  
• Dress up like a giant bug and say "Be my spouse, you louse!"
  
• Mail yourself to China, then mail yourself to your significant other's office. It's important to mail yourself to China first for that realistic, well-traveled box look.
  
• Wait until she's giving an important presentation at work and interrupt the meeting. Tell her "It's your job or me forever."
  
• Write a Top 40 song where you propose to your significant other in the chorus. This only works if he or she has a nose for popular music.
  
• Swallow the ring and get your significant other to take you to the hospital so when they pump your stomach he or she will get a surprise.
  &bulll; You could probably bungee jump off a tall building and slip it on your significant other's finger while she or he is walking underneath without hurting anyone.
  
• Kidnap the local varsity football quarterback and impersonate him during the big game. After taking a snap with a special ball you attached a wedding ring to, throw it at her on the sidelines and say "Marrying me would be a slam dunk." Also, win the game.
  
• Or, you could use the text box at the bottom of a coupon website. Mildred, we have walked through all the stars in the solar system for years now. You were the one by my side when I couldn't stand by my side on my own two feet. For all the days of my years, you filled my insides with emotion and my outside with delight. Will you make me the most full man in the world by being my legal wife? Thanking you in advance, The Man Who Writes These.