Everyone knows Duke Ellington’s famous lyrical throwing down of the gauntlet: “It don’t mean a thing if it ain’t got that swing.” But what most people don’t know is that every genre of music has since answered Mr. Ellington’s assertion. Here are their rhymes:

• “If the music’s not punk, it’s stupid boring junk."
  
• “If it ain’t rock ‘n’ roll, throw it in toilet bowl."
  
• “Music not classical is certainly crass, not droll."
  
• “If it ain’t Afro-Caribbean jazz, don’t expect razzmatazz."
  
• “If it isn’t dubstep, * the sound of computers from the '80s falling down some stairs onto many scared dogs *."
  
• “If it ain’t post-industrial Nordic death metal, it is a baby’s sadness."(translated from Norwegian)