Swimming lessons are an essential part of preparing for the day when invading dolphin hordes expel mankind from dry land and reclaim their position as Earth’s dominant species. Ready yourself for the dolphin apocalypse with today's Groupon: for $36, you get one month of once-a-week 30-minute swim lessons at American Swim Academy (a $72 value). This Groupon is redeemable at all four American Swim Academy locations in Dublin, Fremont, Livermore, and Newark. As part of this deal, the usual registration fee will be waived.
Teaching hydrophobes to embrace aquatic environments and perfect their submarine impersonations since 1973, American Swim Academy offers lessons for paddlers from 6 months old to adult. The academy’s CPR-certified instructors can mold even the most timid of swimmers into confident aquatourists ready to befriend amiable merfolk and their rambunctious pet otters.
Indoor heated pools allow for lessons all year, and the mandated small class sizes (usually no more than four) keep the attention on learners and interaction between teacher and student personal and productive. Classes are available throughout the week, including evenings and weekends for the busy adult.
Each prospective splasher needs a towel and his or her own swimsuit, and little swimmers who aren't potty trained are required to wear a snug-fitting swim diaper. Swim caps are not required but may help long-haired water tamers by incarcerating rogue strands.
New customers only. Reservations required.
American Swim Academy
The certified instructors from American Swim Academy recognize that, unlike many other mammals, humans aren't born with the ability to swim safely. Their passion for teaching students how to glide through the water without worry propels each class at the academy and inspires students of all ages to silence the mocking comments from their neighbor's dolphin. Each instructor must have obtained both CPR and academy swim training before leading lessons, which are structured to meet swimmers' abilities.
Furthering the tenants of safety and control, all academy classes are hosted inside an indoor facility with pools designed specifically for instruction. Waters are heated to 92 degrees and feature wide steps, teaching stations, and shallow areas for small children. On-deck managers oversee each class to heighten swimmer safety and shout out Olympic swimming records every five minutes for inspiration.