Heavy-duty construction vehicles were put here for one reason—to help us mold and shape the earth into something that isn't so unattractive. Here are the main machines we use to pretty up this place:

Bulldozer: This powerful vehicle got its name from its inventor, a bullheaded child who set out to create a machine capable of clearing away all the dangerous, sleeping bulls that stationed themselves near his bedroom window. Today, construction workers exclusively use bulldozers for carpooling and pushing their garbage off the construction site and into the street.

Forklift: These are only used in emergency situations, such as when a building begins to shake violently because one corner was made shorter than the others. To remedy the problem, the construction workers will prop up the faulty corner with the forklift and then elegantly integrate the vehicle into the actual building by covering it with cement.

Backhoe Loader: Construction workers aren't even sure what backhoe loaders do, which is why they always just light them on fire for warmth on days when the temperature dips below 70 degrees.