Spills can happen at any time, whether you're drinking wine from a paper bag or holding a carton of milk over an open flame. Here's how you can sop up your next spill:
Water: These spills occur frequently because our bodies are mainly composed of water and have so many openings for the water to escape. To clean up the spill and get it back where it belongs, open your mouth and let the water evaporate. With any luck, the gas will go back inside your body, turn back into water, and give your organs a healthy-looking shine.
Milk: A milk spill can be resolved in two ways—let the milk age into yogurt and wait for ants to eat it up, or let the milk age into cheese and let bigger ants eat it up.
Ranch Dressing: Though it's no surprise that people in every town love the creamy tang of ranch dressing, it is a surprise that more of them don't know how to clean it up using only half-inch plastic tubing and their mouth.