In nature, the only way for animals to achieve perfect vision is to crossbreed with an eagle, usually resulting in eagle-eyed abominations such as snakes with talons and flying pumas. Keeping human senses sharp is a less formidable task, as proven by today’s Groupon to Amalgamated Eyes. Dr. Russell Scott Kateman has been stylishly matching frames with customer eyes for 30 years. Regular frames cost around $200, though price varies. Men, women, and children can browse Amalgamated's selection of designer frames, which reflect the latest fashion trends and sports brands, as well as a wide selection of sunglasses. Peruse the curated collection with the help of a staff trained in the art of fitting spectacles to skull specs, and leave the premises with eyeballs neatly protected from incoming pigeons, exploratory street lasers, and spontaneous reality television.
Dr. Russell Kateman helms Amalgamated Eyes, where he harnesses his two decades of optometry experience to bolster the sight of his clients through thorough exams and fashionably functional eyewear. During exams, he checks for glaucoma, general visual acuity, and drafts in the window to the soul. Prescriptions furnished from exams then can go on to fuel stylish frames from designers such as Prada and Armani.
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